Friday, August 27, 2010

The Progression of the Argument

"Mothers of Teenagers Know Why Animals Eat Their Young"

Raising a teenager is no joke. Yes, I've only been at it for 22 days, but the changes are becoming very apparent. It's going to be a long road...(did I mention Scott and I will have at least one teenager in the house for the next 17 years?!) Undeniably, the worst part for me has been trying to adjust to Carter's "improved" argument tactics. Let me explain....

Back when Carter was just a wee little lad (4-5 years old) and he would get mad, he would yell "Kick Stuff Throw Stuff". This was pretty much the extent of his meltdowns. Scott and I thought it was hilarious and even to this day when we get mad, we yell "Kick Stuff Throw Stuff". Fast forward a few years and Carter became more predictable (and vocal) when he was really mad. "Nobody cares about me", "I hate everyone", "You are the worst parents ever"...blah blah blah. Very typical, normal behavior. Scott and I rarely let it bother us and both knew that his anger would soon pass and we'd have our happy Carter back :)

Oh how I miss those days. Carter's current argument strategy sucks. I don't know how else to describe it. I'm way out of my league with this and that really freaks me out. I seriously have to figure out a way to deal with this stupid teenager stuff before Carter gets the upperhand. Let me give you an example...

Me:Going off about a bad decision Carter has made

Carter: Mom, don't you think you're taking this just a little too far? I'm sure if you step back and really think about it, you'll realize that you're overexaggerating the entire situation. No one got hurt, nothing bad happened, it's really not that big of a deal. Yelling at me isn't going to change what's already happened. I think you should just calm down and we can talk about this later. Remember what you always tell me "the minute you raise your voice, your words lose all meaning"

What a load of B.S. I may have bought into it if it weren't for the slight smirk on his face. And throwing my own saying in there?? That really pissed me off. (Although I have to admit that I'm impressed he could quote me verbatim) Oh, and by bad decision, we're talking about he and his two bff's making bombs in Logan's backyard and setting them off in Zack's hands...how can I overexaggerate that???? I don't know why, but when we argue, I'd rather him scream and cry...for some reason that makes me feel much better :) This -throwing some big words together in a calm voice with a slight smile on his face and turning everything around to make it seem like it's just me being crazy and unreasonable - is a bunch of crap. I wish I could go back to the "Kick Stuff Throw Stuff" days. Guess it's time for me to start researching and reading about "how to talk to and discipline your teenage son". Sounds fun, right?!

All that being said, I'm absolutely loving Brady's answer to being angry. When he is really really mad about something he yells at me and Scott "You guys are being such hoosiers". LOVE IT :)

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